Kelly is a successful entrepreneur who is frustrated with dating. After her divorce, she threw herself into her career. Years later, Kelly made time for dating. However, it didn’t go well. Every time she thought she’d met someone incredible after a few weeks, the relationship fizzled out. Kelly doesn’t understand why she can be successful in business yet be unsuccessful in love.
Can you relate to Kelly? If so, you may be facing the following challenges.
The Analytical Mind
Fear of Failure
Let’s face it, dating and relationships can feel risky. You can’t control your partner, and you’re afraid of setting yourself up for heartbreak. Even though you long for love, your fear of failure stops you. Like Kelly, if you’re used to being successful, you find it difficult to take risks in dating, so you rationalize that you’re better off being single, thereby missing the gifts you can find in a great relationship.
Vulnerability
Generally speaking, successful women find it hard to be vulnerable because they needed to stay strong and not show their weaknesses in their careers. It may be difficult to express your needs, insecurities, and fears honestly when building a new relationship. You may feel like a fish out of water, weak and uncertain, and your fear of appearing weak causes you to keep your date safely at a distance. Actually, vulnerability is a beautiful part of being human, and it’s an asset because it shows that you are comfortable with who you are. When you have a deep sense of self-acceptance, you can be yourself on a date. The result is that you make it easier for your date to be vulnerable with you, too, allowing a bond to grow.
Taking Your Time
Relationships take time. You can’t build a deep, loving relationship hastily. If you’re accustomed to hurrying to meet deadlines in your career, you may want a relationship to happen quickly, too. This mindset commonly means three dates and then sex. With this approach, you don’t give yourself time to get to know your partner at a deep level. Typically, when you move too fast, you’re bound to find out things about your partner that you wished you’d known sooner. When you take your time and get to know someone slowly, you’ve grown in trust and vulnerability with that person before taking the relationship to bed. If your partner doesn’t honor your approach, it shows you that he’s not the right person for you. Patience is gold in relationship building.